In my last blog post I talked about new parents I know and the relationships of all of their cards. They all have many positive connections and it all sounds so idyllic!

But what if you have Venus or Jupiter connections between you and other friends/family and it isn’t so sweet and loving?

Yes, it happens.

How can that be?

It has happened to me and I’ve seen it happen with several friends. You suddenly aren’t getting along AT ALL or even end a relationship with someone you have a Venus relationship with.

I have many Venus connections with my biological family, yet, there were many years of abuse and NO connection at all.

While there are many reasons for the turning upside down of any relationship, I wanted to address the Venus relationship specifically.

Here are 3 reasons why a Venus connection can go awry:

1 – Are either of you living the negative side of your Venus?

As with everything in life, the cards and planets have both their positive and their negative aspects. We’ve lived in a world of duality. (<—- yes, that sentence was past-tense, but that is a post for another day!)

Venus is about LOVE. It is romance, connection, beauty, art, pleasure, bliss and Venus energy seeks to create harmony, so you can see how having a Venus connection with someone can create a very easy, loving relationship.

However, what is the opposite of Love? It is Fear.

Astrologer Steven Forrest says that the dysfunctional side of Venus is: Indolence, being manipulative, vanity, spinelessness and chronic abandonment to sensuality.

If one, or both of the parties involved is disowning or suppressing their true pleasure, bliss, sensuality or are fearing LOVE (in any way), then the relationship will reflect back to them any of the parts they are disowning. This creates a repulsion feeling and any of the dysfunctional aspects of Venus will show up in the relationship.

While we can’t do the work for the other person, if any negativity is going on, we can make sure we are clear, aware and healing it on our end.

 2 – Are either of you jealous of the other person? 

Check in to see if you are jealous of anything they seemingly have in their life that you wish you had. Because Venus is about experiencing our true pleasure and bliss in life, it can bring up issues around our guilt, shame or suppression of genuine pleasure and joy.

Is there any type of pleasure, love or even things they have that you want, but are feeling you can’t ever have?

Are they expressing happiness when you are feeling very unhappy in your life?

Did they reach a goal they were after, yet you are still struggling to reach yours?

Fights, arguments, passive-aggressive behavior and abuse can flair up or even be ever present between two people who have a Venus connection because these issues will be high-lighted when you are together.

The friendship or family bond can start out as sweet and loving, then turn on a dime to never recover UNLESS the disowned/suppressed issues are healed.

It can be devastating when this happens between a parent/child, siblings or even a couple because that original, organic deep love is still there even while both parties ae feeling such negativity. Those are the relationships you can’t just say adios to and walk away to forget it all in a few weeks.

3- Are either of you confusing Venus Love with Sex?

Another reason the Venus apple cart can topple is when one party confuses Venus connection with sex.

How does this play out?

Let’s say a father has a Venus connection with his daughter. His own sexuality is wounded and as she grows up, he starts having ‘unhealthy’ feelings towards her (because he is experiencing the Venus energy, but has it confused with his sexual issues), so what does he do?

He disconnects from her (fearing he’ll do something bad), begins to abuse her, abandons her or directs his frustration at her – or what happened in my case – he puts her in the position of his spouse and forgets she is his daughter and only a child.

They love being around each other, yet, he feels fear and she is confused and feels abandoned and betrayed.

I know other adults who have a Venus relationship with the parent of the opposite sex where the parent ‘worshiped’ them and put them in the position of fulfilling their non-existent (or in constant ruin) romantic life.

Emotional manipulation and the re-occurrence of abandonment was the on-going theme of their relationship.

Because we aren’t taught how to deal with things like this and many think that ‘therapy’ is for the weak and crazy, these issues tear families apart.

Personally, I have HOPE because millennials are more aware and willing to learn how to relate and deal with inner wounds! Families who have Venus connections can support and strengthen one another in upleveling love, the enjoyment of life and all that Venus gives to us–which creates happy, healthy families!

Have you had a Venus connection go terribly wrong?