Is perfectionism keeping your reality conditional?

Is perfectionism something you are always striving for? Or, is it your Achilles heel?

Do you tend to think that, “Once everything is perfect, then I can… (fill in the blank)?

I’ll admit, it’s something that I’ve struggled with.

Mine started as a very small child with a father who thought if one wasn’t perfect 100% of the time, they were worthless. Even as a 4-year-old, he’d set traps for me to show me how imperfect I was….

It has been one of my bugaboos for 50 some years.

Any of us with Virgo prominent in our birth charts (my Venus is in Virgo) have a perfection tendency in some area of our life.

So when our guides kept bringing up this topic (and the week they did, I also came across the article about the war against perfectionism Alicia Keys is doing), I paid attention.

The topic also came up in the session we did about the Orlando shooting, so I think it is worth expanding on.

Our Guides have been referring to it frequently because right now, my life is very out-of-sorts. I’ve been taken out of my comfort zone in many ways over the past few months. As well, Randi and I have been working diligently to get the website “perfect” and our schedules “perfect” and come up with a perfect routine, when in fact, we’ve been experiencing much chaos…which sets my teeth on edge!

As a coach and an entrepreneur, the topic of perfectionism comes up a lot.

We procrastinate because we think all has to be perfect before we are official.

One of my coaches taught that “imperfect action trumps non-action” because so many people put off things out of the feeling that all must be perfect to begin.

Whether it is school, our job, our relationships or our bodies, perfectionism can be the demise of way too many dreams and goals.

Below is a section from a session on the topic of perfection. The “ritual” mentioned is Randi’s usual way of getting ready to channel, with the lighting of candles from her altars honoring the four directions, above and below and her intention setting. She felt that she had to do this “getting ready” ritual in order to be able to channel. She needed things to be just so to feel that the channeling would happen as it should.

“We are wanting to remind all of you that your omniscience is as immediate as you perceive it to be. The rituals are excellent because they are focusing of energy; they are so excellent at setting an intention and honing in on a particular frequency from all frequencies that exist. So with Randi lighting the candle, she is preparing her energy to receive us, but what we would say to her is that it is not necessary. During a busy day, and wrangling the fans, and scratching her mosquito bites, and trying to get a session in before the baby starts crying or the parents get home, and allowing enough time for her treat of Game of Thrones… we would say in all of that, her ritual is just as immediate, in the sense that she take a deep breath and she do the next thing on her task list.

We are saying this as a general indication to everyone that your reality is what you perceive it to be, and if you always believe that the perfection of reality is only when you do a certain set of things, then you’re keeping your reality conditional. Whereas simply being in the now, and no matter how chaotic or wild or non-orderly that the now might appear to you…we would say to be in the now. Cherish the now for what it is and allow for the perfection of your reality to be happening always, rather than waiting for certain things to be in order and in place. For there is beauty, there is evolution, there is growth, there is poignancy IN THE NOW. Enjoy it; be in it. That is where eternally we are speaking to you from.

In understanding just how powerful our perceptions are, I’ve been able to shift a lot in my life. It works the same way in every single area of our life – no exceptions.

If you think that certain things have to be in place before you can achieve, receive, experience, feel, know or do…then THAT perception is the ONLY thing blocking you. You’ve placed a condition on your reality and experiences. YOU. Not your boss, lover, parents or circumstances. YOU. And then what follows is a conditional reality.

So, WHY do we do that?

Back to my father – one positive thing he did teach me was about the topic of “perfection” (ironically).

Here was his analogy: We tend to think that a perfect piece of chalk is right out of the box, all smooth, unused and tall. But, the perfect piece of chalk is the piece that has been used so much that it is hard to even hold. It is “perfect” because it is being used as it was intended. I like that analogy. I’ve been using that analogy when I feel out-of-sorts and that I want my “perfect” situation. I see how my situation is perfect because it is doing what it is meant to do.

A “perfect” piece of chalk has done NOTHING. NO writing on the board. No piles of white dust. Nothing for us to read.

The very used piece of chalk gave us something. Words, images, information. Yes, there are also piles of dust and we might be sneezing and need to clean up – (What a mess! So imperfect! ) – but we GOT something.

The point the guides keep making is that life is never a constant – it is always changing. We are creative beings and that creativity is what keeps us moving forward, trying new things, taking chaos and making it into something that works for us.

When we see a certain rung of the ladder we feel we must climb as that “perfect” place we need to get to, we are losing sight of our ability as creators. Once we are to that rung, we are different, life is different and we need a new rung to go for. Really, there is no “perfect” rung, because we are always changing and what we want is always changing.

That takes us back to the meaning of perfection as: doing what we/it is meant to do.

Again from our guides: There is much more evolution that comes from chaos, then comes from order, yes?

Yes.

• Where and when in your life are you wishing for the perfect situation, the perfect person and the perfect conditions?
• Where are you creating a conditional reality that isn’t helping you, but blocking you?
• What if you saw something that doesn’t seem perfect as something that is meant to do what needs to be done?